What my mother gave me

I had a conversation with my adult daughter recently, and we were talking about what our former church possibly gave to her. I suggested that perhaps the church gave her music, or at least the opportunity to perform music. She quickly corrected me and said, "No, Mom. You're the one that gave that to me." After some discussion about it, we concluded that church was just one of many avenues that we had for participating in music, but the church didn't give her (or me) the gift of music. In fact, my own mother gave it to me, and I shared it with my daughter and grandchildren.

So I've been thinking about that conversation and started thinking about all the gifts that my own mother has given to me. As I've thought about this, gratitude for my own mom has come to the forefront of my thoughts.

The first thing that anyone thinks of when it comes to my mom is music. Piano, organ, accordion, and trumpet. She taught me all of that. She started teaching me on the piano when I was about three years old. I performed piano and organ duets with her in public by the time that I was four years old. As I got a bit older, she taught me the other instruments, and I can still play all of them except for the trumpet. I switched to baritone horn during high school when I had braces, and I continued playing it during junior college. My mom found piano teachers for me when I got to the point that I was ready for others to teach me. I really can't adequately express how big of a part that playing music in private, or in public, or with a group, has made in my life. Because of my mom, I had opportunities to get college scholarships and travel with performing groups and accompany community choirs and church choirs. Because of my mom, I have taught piano lessons to others, including my own daughter and grandchildren. Because of my mom, I've made lifelong friends through our love of music.

My mom also gave me other gifts...

• She taught me how to sew. She made many of my clothes growing up, including my homecoming and prom dresses. By the time that I was in high school, I was making a lot of my own clothes as well.
• She taught me how to balance a checkbook. Even with new software and online ways of doing it, I still do it how my mom taught me.
• She taught me about curiosity. She has always loved to learn things. She learned how to use a computer as an older adult, she learned how to reupholster furniture and automobile seats and created her own business doing it, she learned how to maintain cars, how to grow a garden, how to grow strawberries, how to perform music in public, how to sightread music, how to install carpet, how to make root beer, how to dehydrate food and build a dehydrator to do it, how to incubate eggs and let them hatch in to chicks.
• She made me so proud of her when she entered so many things in the county fair and got blue ribbons galore!
• She taught me how to do sand art and ceramics and macrame and crochet and knit.
• She taught me how to preserve fruit, jelly, and vegetables.
• She taught me how to drive defensively.
• She taught me how to read. And write. Before I went to school. She taught me how to write my name.
• She taught me how to read music.
• She shared with me the love of animals. For her, it's specifically dogs and horses.
• She might not know this, but she taught me forgiveness, patience, and kindness. We all go through phases of life when we separate ourselves from our parents, or blame them for things, or resent them for something, or disappoint them somehow. But my mom has loved me through all of it. Every single thing, every single time.
• She also gave me the gift of having an open mind. When I was going through the most difficult part of my faith transition a few years ago, she listened to me and didn't judge me or think that I was a bad person.
• She gave me the gift of being the same unpretentious person no matter where she is or who she is with. She has never pretended to be someone that she's not. She has never been fake or two-faced. She is always herself in every situation.
• She has shown me that you're never too old to enjoy watching NBA or MLB games on TV.
• She is a free spirit, deep down. You can't make her do anything or stop her from doing something if she wants to do it. Maybe it's frustrating sometimes, but I admire her for it.
• And she has a calm demeanor. Maybe I didn't get as much of that as I'd like. But I do make up for that in passion. :-)

There's more, and I'll add to this list as I think about it. 

My mother is so much a part of me. Not just her DNA, but her soul. Yes, I'm my own person with my own thoughts and wishes and opinions. But I'm grateful that much of my core is shared with my mom.